Fashion What?

Late summer/early fall fashion is so confused and confusing. 

Last night I looked through the new Anthro catalog with a furrowed brow because I just didn't GET it-- the way some things were paired an accessorized. What's up with a full skirt and a baggy sweater?  When you are five-two and chubby, this look is not possible.  Also these mullet dresses?  Why? But it's Anthro and their styling is quirky and I can always make it look plain WI mom in the store-- it's a gift I have, styling things like a plain WI mom.  Pro-tip: JUST ADD A DICKEY.

But then I walked to the bookstore today after my class to buy a new Moleskine notebook-- hooray!  I love a crisp new Moleskine notebook, and I haven't been in the market for 1 for over 18 months.  Anways, on my walk, I was stunned-- STUNNED-- by the weird and generally unflattering fashion choices.  The cutest girl I saw was wearing an Aaron Rodgers jersey (people are not messing around about the Packer here) over cut-off jean shorts with black Chuck Taylors, black hipster glasses, and a cute little tiny bow around her ponytail.  She looked fresh and messy and adorable with her short shorts just barely showing at the bottom of her jersey which was tucked in a tiny it in the front by not in the back and her long long legs and her ankle tattoo.  There were lots of girls walking around all leg-- that's how short their shorts were-- we are talking diaper-length.  And high waisted. With weird, blousey, color blocked shirts and Keds.  What the hell?  How does a 36-year-old mom of 4 with a tummy pooch and the kind of thigh cellulite that comes with being a 36-year-old mom of 4 translate this into anything approaching wearable?  And the cropped shirts?  WHY ARE THERE COPPED SHIRTS?   A lot of girls were wearing shapeless, high waisted, baggy-legged short shorts, too, that looked completely horrible even though they all had brilliant bodies.  What is going on?  Oh!  And there were suspenders a plenty.  I DON'T GET IT.

Not me.  I mommed up an Anthro jersey dress with Toms wedges, a middle part, and a scarf and no jewelry because I forgot it.

Speaking of confusing.  I have been doing My Fitness pal FOR REAL for over a week and I have gained 2 pounds.  I am a little teapot, for goodness sake.

Look at me last night sitting on the couch NOT EATING (but, yes, drinking wine).  I have an entire under face and a barrel around my middle.  And I am hungry.  If the weight is going to keep creeping on, I might as well eat, damn it.

We took this the other night at our celebratory dinner.  Kiddie cocktails are reserved for only the fanciest of occasions.

Miraculously, the first day of school shots wound up in my feed.  You know you couldn't wait (especially since you have seen these on Facebook)

Cooper is so jazzed about his back pack-- it;s adorable how excited he is to be a big boy and tell everyone about his day at school. He was really offended at dinner after his first day when Ben kept asking Harry and Jack questions about their days.  "I bye by!" He reminded us.  "I have park!"  He really liked the play ground.

 Look at my short short skirt.  SOMEONE put my dress in the dryer.  But I wore it anyway because eff it.  I did change out of my super awesome and super tall new heels because they took the whole look right over the edge...

And these guys, who both smile like they're in pain