Oh so many things I have done poorly as a mom lately. HOW CAN I JUST PICK 5?
A short list of bad parenting this week, or my current MOTHER OF THE YEAR application packet:
1. Encouraging Harry and Jack to develop a caffeine addiction. Listen, you would push coffee on these guys, too, if you lived with them. Their unpleasantness in the morning is… a lot. Sometimes one of them will say something that sounds (to me) totally benign to the other one and they’ll just be, like all of the sudden punching each other in the face. I told them that no one over the age of 7 wakes up happy to be conscious early in the morning and have started buying mocha flavored Coffee Mate and making sure to brew a pot of coffee to be ready before they wake up. Today, Jack had his with milk, Nestle Quick powder (JUST HAVING THIS STUFF IN MY CABINET SHOULD GET ITS OWN LISTICLE MENTION AS A TERRIBLE MOM MOVE), and sugar. LOL/shrug
2. Being totally over my melty (autocorrect changed this to meaty, which also works) toddler on the big red mat by the end of a very 2-year-old Little Gym class. (She was having a great time playing on some mats set up to be a climbing/jumping station. But then! Those mats were a featured activity— the instructor stops the playtime music 3 times per class and introduces a new activity, and Minnie would prefer to just do her own thing— and other kids started using them, and Minnie was a thunder cloud). My friend Tessa sent me some pics of my ennui, and this is my favorite:
Q
3. Letting Dorothy watch Minnie after dinner so I can clean the kitchen, even though I know that “watching” her entails letter her watch tween TV on Dorothy’s bed surrounded by choking hazards.
Wait, Actually. I have Nestle Quick powder and also my 9 year-old has a TV in her room. WE ARE ALL DONE HERE. THAT’S FIVE.
4. Not packing my junior a lunch for ACT day. He packed his own:
5. Zoning out on my phone while Minnie did bathtub paint.
Honestly? This all sounds SUPER fun (with the exception of a grumpy toddler; my friend describes one of her children's personalities as "as cloudy with a chance of thunderstorms.")
ReplyDeleteMy kids watch tons of screens, eat lots of sugar, and my son adores coffee (and he's 8).
an 8 y/o coffee drinker-- I love this!!
DeleteI 100% admire your mothering skills. You are an excellent mother. And I HOPE that this was all tongue in cheek, but honestly, look at how you are teaching your kids independence and survival skills!!!!
ReplyDeleteLove both melty and meaty in relation to Minnie, as well as describing her as a thunder cloud. She certainly has the dramatics aspect of toddlering DOWN, lol!
aaaaaaaw, thanks :)
DeleteJack should tru coffee with a hot chocolate packet. The poor-man's mocha is always a hit! My kid also loves screens and sugar and my husband is trying his best to get him to drink espresso, so, it's all good ;-)
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the poor man's mocha. At hockey games, you can get a rink mocha by ordering half coffee/half hot chocolate.
DeleteMy husband and I were just talking about the nostalgia factor of Nesquik and I am SO HAPPY to hear that children today are still eating/drinking it! I think that's something they'll really respect in future years. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's the only kind of chocolate milk we drank as kids. No more tin carton, though.
DeleteYou sound rueful, but I'm picking up some good tips here--I should push coffee on my 15-year-old too. The Emo Minnie series gave me some good chuckles. And aw--look at your hand gentling melty Minnie 💗
ReplyDeleteSO emo
DeleteLisa here. I would push coffee too if it helped with moods! Mornings are rough and emotions can run high.
ReplyDeleteWe are pretty permissive with sugar over here. The boys eat a lot of donuts and they get a little something sweet at the end of dinner. I limited sugar more when Paul was young. Now I have given up and figure I’m teaching them moderation?? Definitely NOT MOTY over here either as my kids have watched several movies this weekend.
I love sugar myself, so it's hard to limit for the kids
DeleteI support, (nay, applaud) your choices
ReplyDeletethank you!
DeleteHere's the thing - we force teenagers to get up at times that are not appropriate for them, and we expect them to do it without caffeine? Seriously, you're a great mom. Let them drink coffee - at least all of you will survive (relatively) unscathed. :)
ReplyDelete